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Letting Go to Create Something Good with Your Life

At this time of year, traditionally, there is a collective sense of both endings and beginnings. You might find yourself making a ritual of letting go of or throwing out items, considering stopping a habit, or looking at what has kept you in patterns that do not seem to change.

There is a big difference however in the process of letting go and throwing things out. Letting go is a process of creating space within that builds greater harmony in what life has presented over time. It implies a relationship with what you are presented with instead of toughing it out, manipulating, being the victim, the rescuer or the perpetrator. Letting go allows you to create something good with your life.

Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.~Herman Hesse

Throwing out things that are no longer serving your spiritual growth is different than throwing out a broken vase or ripped pants. Throwing out can literally be a place of denial, inability to work with, or learn from a situation or relationship. While taking care of your life energy is healthy, throwing out the lesson from a situation or relationship can keep you in the gerbil wheel of repetition. In these cases, throwing out the lesson is not really letting go.

At the Still Point

It is really unconscious negative patterns that keep you in circular dead-end pathways. The false hope of getting your genuine needs met in a situation or relationship that brings you back to your original negative pattern without internal positive change leads to repeating the cycle over and over.


Getting to a place where you can start to work with the repetitive pattern means you need to call upon your body, mind, and spirit. Mindfulness and time to consider what is happening within can lead you to a greater sense of grounding and homeostasis. It is only in this place that your inner wisdom and energy can collect for reviewing what is going on, and then allow you to consider the next steps.

“At the still point of the turning world. Neither flesh nor fleshless;
Neither from nor towards; at the still point, there the dance is,
But neither arrest nor movement. And do not call it fixity, 
Where past and future are gathered. Neither movement from nor towards,
Neither ascent nor decline. Except for the point, the still point,
There would be no dance, and there is only the dance.”
~ T S Eliot

Family Systems work is one of the many disciplines in Resonance Repatterning. Modalities work with creating order within your system so you can experience the freedom to face life and do something good with it. Doing something good relates to giving dignity to all of the members of your system by allowing them to take responsibility and place so you can do the same with your own life.

Widening the circle of your beliefs so that you can explore new possibilities in your life is one way to explore new emotions, responses, and interactions with the world around you. Knowing that the circle of life through generations has brought you here allows you to expand your awareness.

From Circle to Maze to Spiral

Maze image from

The questions we ask ourselves from time to time like “Why do I keep going through this in my mind?” “Why does this keep happening or coming up?” point to the way we are interacting with the material. Considering events, relationships, and emotional anchors to the past can leave you feeling like you have not solved the puzzle, and have made no progress in your growth process. It can leave you feeling like you are lost in a maze.

Letting go of the idea that the material from the past is backtracking, an impossible puzzle, or circular, consider it as a spiral.

Coherence Continuum

The spiral is a spiritualized circle. In the spiral form, the circle, uncoiled, has ceased to be vicious; it has been set free. ~Vladimir Nabokov

This can show up in your beliefs about a relationship or your self. You can become more deeply aware of your innocence and fragility in the past with compassion. This allows you to free yourself from judgment or blame so that you can use this information for healing your greater connection to self. Letting go, in this case, creates new ways of seeing choice, and for opportunities in how you can move more securely into your life today.


I once met a woman at a Resonance Repatterning® Conference who told her story of visiting the Chartres Cathedral Labyrinth in France. She walked the labyrinth with a question in her heart. When she finally reached the center, she met a man with whom she spent the rest of the day in conversation. She described the meeting as a spiritual appointment with him. They each walked the labyrinth with a question in their own hearts and met at the center at exactly the same time. They both learned something from each other related to the question they held in their hearts as they walked the labyrinth that day.

Appointments with life can also include being thrown off the path in challenging situations. These situations can be opportunities for a point of choice for spiraling down into greater non-coherence or spiraling up into greater awareness of your inner strengths and values. No matter what the situation, person or problem that shows up in your life, it is an appointment that can lead to a greater sense of feeling whole while integrating parts that have been excluded or neglected with greater love, attention, and expression.

New Pathways to Wholeness

In a workshop with Jean Houston at a Humanistic Psychology Conference, she compared a kind of schizophrenia or fragmented parts not yet integrated or available to work within the body-mind system to what she phrased as polyphrenia. Polyphrenia creates a wider and more inclusive space for taking the information and lessons from your spiral journey through life to heal, acknowledge and integrate the lessons from your life experiences so you can use that wisdom for your life today.

The point of a maze is to find its center. The point of a labyrinth is to find your center. New pathways to wholeness are created when you let go of the resistance, guilt, resentment, self-pity, anger, negative judgments and regrets. This happens with an acceptance that your life path includes spiritual discovery with challenges along the way.

The journey you take in life is like a labyrinth. The labyrinth includes the spiral and circle together. A labyrinth is a metaphor for your own spiritual journey that includes all kinds of appointments, twists, turns, and wanderings through life. It is a pathway that starts with the still point to focus and let go of resistance to an expected outcome. By walking mindful of your experience, it leads you to your center. By taking the inspiration and insight, this creates a widened circle of awareness. This awareness can then be applied to your life with what you have learned in your center. Letting go and learning along the way creates new pathways of experience with grace, compassion, and deeper understanding.

Willingness to become more greatly accepting and aware creates the pathway back out into the world with the gems of insight from your journey within. Making space for your feelings and experiences with what they are telling you informs you of what you want to create based on your inner needs and how to live these values in action. This leads you on the return path with what you have learned towards a greater sense of life purpose, meaning, and feeling of doing something good with your life.

Walking a labyrinth is just one of many ways to move into your center. Meditation, taking time for your self, getting in touch with your breath, mindful movement, drawing, journaling or getting into nature can all be ways of reflecting on what is going on in your life right now.

Resonance Repatterning® sessions get to the root of what you need to experience a positive and sustainable change in your life. Your body is a map of your life’s experiences. It is through working with this information that transformation through the connection to your family system’s patterns can be healed. By doing so, you gain awareness, a greater sense of ease, peace and author-ship for your life.

Contact Kimberly Rex, MS to set up your personal Resonance Repatterning session by phone, Skype or in-person here.

Re-pattern your life to experience greater integrity in your wellness and well-being.

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